Hey there ‘Redheads… Sorry I’m late, but I’ve been burning the candle at both ends the last week, and I simply was unable to find the inspiration or the energy to get to the blog in time. Besides, not a lot of blog worthy stuff has happened and it’s taken me a bit longer to compile enough stuff to fill this installment. But, you don’t come here for excuses…you come here for…well, what the hell do you come here for, exactly? While we try to noodle that one through, let’s get to the heart of things (then, on to duodenum)…

Last Friday, I ventured into the blustery cold to bathe my ears in some funk. I went to see Victor Wooten at the 9:30 Club. Victor is a virtuoso of el quatro stringendo solo basso profundo de electronique *ahem*. He plays the bass…has since he was 2. Seeing him live is a jaw-dropping musical religious experience. The club was packed mostly with local musicians who came to pay tribute to a living legend. I was able to get a spot right in front of the stage, where the sound thumped right through you. At one point, I think my heart actually started beating in 11/4 time. Those of you who are musicians, and know what that is, can probably get an idea of how cool this show was. For those of you who need the audio/video, here’s Victor and his brother Reggie having a thump-off…

Can’t fake the funk. The one downside to a show at the 9:30 Club, is having to stand for the whole show. Forget barking, my dogs were whimpering. The pain was more than worth it to stand about a foot and a half away from Victor whilst he works his magic.

I came up with an idea for a one-panel cartoon, but I don’t know how to draw. Here’s the premise: Where’s Waldo is at the gym, getting ready to lift a barbell as somebody walks by. The caption reads, “Hey buddy, can ya spot me?” It’s funny on a third-grade level, but it cracked me up.

I mentioned earlier that I’ve been burning the candle at both ends recently. Last night pretty much ran me out of wax. I picked up a one-nighter as a favor to a buddy of mine, Paul Lyons, who wanted me as the feature. Unfortunately, I agreed to do it before I MapQuested the location. Fishersville, VA…which, according to MapQuest was 2hrs 45min away. This didn’t take into account having to fight through rush hour traffic for an additional 30. So, trip time there: 3hrs 15min. And, I had to drive back home after the gig so I could go to work today (I called in sick). The gig was on the downside of ordinary…smallish crowd…no cd sales…but the pay was decent. Then there was the trip home. 2hrs 15min. I don’t think I could’ve gotten home faster if I’d slingshot myself around the sun (professional driver…closed course…do not attempt). I caught my second wind when I realized that the trip could’ve qualified as a quantum leap.

Before I wrap up this installment, there is, once again, some sad business to attend to. We lost Peter Boyle this week. Sure, his most visible work was on Everybody Loves Raymond, but I never watched that show. I remember him from obscure classic flicks like Turk 182! or The Dream Team, where he played an escaped mental patient who thought he was Jesus Christ. To me, he’ll always be the lovable monster in one of the funniest movies ever made, Young Frankenstein. Most tributes focus on the classic Puttin’ on the Ritz scene, but I don’t give you the same old rehashed crap that everyone else does…I give you completely different crap. Here’s one of the funniest scenes in the movie, between the monster and the lonely blind man, played by a young Gene Hackman…

Your comedy homework this weekend is to go see comedy dynamo Justin Schlegel and Danny Rouhier at the first ever Saturday comedy night at Ned Devine’s in Sterling. There will be a quiz later.

Oh, and Happy Hannukah. Have a latke on me.

To be continued…

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